Managing your own home is the most important role you could have in your lifetime. Here are a few tips for becoming a full-time homemaker.
Growing up, I was encouraged to work outside the home. I was encouraged to marry, but not rely on a husband to get me through life financially. I was encouraged to have children, but not put my own life on pause to dedicate more time to them.
When I became a Christian, I began studying Scripture for what God wanted for me.
Sure, I knew how I was raised. And I knew what my selfish desires were. But if the Lord promises to take care of us because He treasures us more than He does birds and flowers, surely He had something to say about how He would do that!
I started digging into what God wanted for me as a woman of God. And that’s how I found homemaking.
What we call homemaking, God calls a woman’s role in the home. But is it her only role? How can she make that work with the cost of living so high?
Let’s take a look and chat about it.
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What is a Homemaker?
A homemaker, or domestic engineer, is literally “the watch” or “keeper of the house.” Biblically, a homemaker is the defense between her home and the forces outside of it.
I dive more into the Biblical definition of a homemaker in What is a Homemaker?
Socially, a homemaker is a woman who doesn’t work outside the home. Usually, that doesn’t exclude a work-from-home job. However, that usually means the woman isn’t working more than part-time hours every week.
The Role of a Homemaker
A homemaker does everything from organizing the family’s schedule to maintaining a clean home. The laundry, cooking, cleaning, and social activities usually fall under her scope of responsibility.
But I talked about in What is a Homemaker? a homemaker’s true impact is the fact that her work focuses on others and not herself.
Homemaking is a thankless job full of endless chores. The dishes always need to be cleaned. The laundry always needs to be done. The house always needs to be tidied.
But that’s not the point. The point is that the home-cooked meal can be a balm to the soul of a weary man trying to provide for his family. The blanket that has to be washed and dried on the same day it was soiled is a priority because it comforts the child who can’t sleep without it. The muddy floors that need to be mopped are evidence of a fun spring day with the promise of popsicles in the bathtub.
Homemaking is always a good thing. That’s what we need to embrace, understand, and pour our energies into.
I’m so thankful you want to learn more!
Since homemaking is my job, I take it pretty seriously. I’m so thankful that you do, too!
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How To Become a Full-Time Homemaker
This isn’t an exhaustive list. This also isn’t an exact roadmap for what you and your family may need.
This isn’t even how I became a homemaker!
I was a full-time, working woman when my husband and I got married. We always knew I would stay home with our children, so I began making professional moves to make that dream a reality.
After finding that a job wasn’t going to work well for our family, and subsequently leaving that job, I found myself at home full-time! That’s when we started really tackling things like finances, starting our family, and what our responsibilities would be as husband and wife.
So trust me when I say – I know what it’s like to go to sleep as a working woman and wake up as a homemaker. If I could do it over again, I think this is the path I would follow.
Come to Peace with People’s Expectations
I touched a bit on what the spiritual and social definitions of a homemaker are. And those may be easy to accept!
But dealing with the looks, opinions, advice, or remarks of friends, family, and strangers may be another pill to swallow.
This is where you and your husband have a frank conversation about what it means for the wife to stay home. You need to ask yourself questions like –
- What does this mean for our family?
- What are we willing to sacrifice to make this a reality?
- Is there a point we would consider for the wife to return to work?
- Are there older, wiser people we can go to for advice and encouragement?
- What are the best ways we can politely deal with adversity?
When you are rooted in homemaking being what’s best for your family, there’s not much that will sway you away from it. I truly encourage you to plant deep roots in whatever reasoning you have for being a homemaker.
Define Your Household Budget
Finances are the first obvious hurdle to homemaking. When money isn’t coming into the bank account, you quickly start to realize the impact!
If you are dedicated to being a homemaker, it’s time to have an honest conversation with your husband. Is his job, or your work-from-home job, enough to sustain you financially?
Income isn’t the only focus of a budget. The true focus is the expenses.
Are you living outside of your means?
Creating a budget is the best way to make sure you’re living within your means. On a sheet of paper list your expected monthly income and subtract from that your expected monthly expenses.
If you find that your expenses are greater than your income, it’s time to take some action.
There are so many things you can do to cut expenses.
- Renegotiate your insurance policies
- Cancel subscriptions and use free services in your area for entertainment
- Get out (and stay out) of debt
- Cash flow your expenses
- Save up an emergency fund
- Move to a home you can afford
- Thrift things like children’s clothes, home decor, and more
For even more money-saving hacks, check out these related blog posts:
Tips for Living Off of One Income (Without Credit Cards)
Easy (And Cheap) Ways to Stock a Pantry on a Budget
Will Grinding Your Coffee Save You Money?
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Set the Tone for Your Home Environment
You, as the homemaker, get to set the tone for your home. And I don’t mean that lightly – truly take a moment to consider what you want for your home.
If money is tight, is that going to be your focus? Because if so, it will be the focus of everyone in the home, too. That means it’s up to you to bring the peace.
Will you find joy in the free activities in your area? Are you willing to make do with what you already have on hand?
What about things like hard days with small children? Or other unexpected things like cars breaking down, job troubles, and family-related drama?
When we, as homemakers, can face each day secure in the peace and comfort of the Lord our God, we model that for our families. That can be just what they need in times of trouble – the example of an unshakable faith.
If you aren’t a believer, the point remains the same. A calm, assured, confident mother is going to reduce anxiety and encourage her family.
Seek Counsel from Older Women
If you are struggling with your faith, this would be an excellent time to take the advice from Titus 2 and seek the counsel of older women.
As a young, stay-at-home mom, I went through a period of being overwhelmed by the world. My husband was gone for work a lot, money was tight, and it just felt like nothing was going right. Almost like we were always playing catchup.
An older woman from my church approached me and offered to be my friend. She wanted to make a personal effort to engage with the younger women in our congregation.
Little did she know she was an answer to my prayers.
We began having lunch together, going to thrift stores, sending encouraging text messages, and even doing things like driving around looking at Christmas lights with my kids!
In the midst of our time together, I started to learn she was a stay-at-home mom, too. She was thrifting outfits for her children when thrift stores weren’t the least bit popular. When her husband was gone for work she struggled with the same feelings of isolation and loneliness that I did.
Because she was willing to share her stories, and now her time, with me, I was able to see that I truly wasn’t alone. What I was experiencing was nothing new under the sun.
That’s the point of spending quality time with women who are older, wiser, and more mature than us. So we can learn from them and gain more than just knowledge – we can gain perspective, empathy, and understanding we wouldn’t readily come to ourselves for years to come.
I encourage all young women to seek counsel from older women. Ask them what they think makes a good homemaker. Ask them to teach you a new skill. Women of all ages can bond over learning a new skill!
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Master Homemaking Skills
When we hear, “homemaking skills,” it’s almost like our minds go straight to cooking, cleaning, and hosting others.
I want to challenge you to think of homemaking skills as the rhythm with which your home runs. Homemaking skills build on each other. And when you have established a good system in one area of your home, it can positively influence all the others.
To better understand this, you could equate homemaking skills to home economics. Home economics encompasses food and nutrition, home decor, home equipment, human development, and finances.
As a modern homemaker, you can begin establishing healthy rhythms in your home that bless your family with nourishing foods, a clean and organized home, and strong relationships between you and each other, all while operating in the black.
The daily discipline and time management skills you develop will lead you to truly master your home! Home management begins to feel less like a burden and more like a way of life.
Don’t wait to get started! Start ditching bad habits today!
If you’re interested in reading more about establishing routines and rhythms, check out these blog posts:
How to Set (and Achieve) Goals as a Homemaker
How to Create a Homemaking Morning Routine
How to Create a Simple Home Management System
Understand How to Take Care of a House
Home economics isn’t just these broad topics. There are practical tasks you can start tackling today!
Small home appliance care, paying bills on time, scheduling seasonal maintenance, and performing small home maintenance tasks like checking gutters, changing batteries, and maintaining landscaping are all things homemakers can do.
Do the dishes need to be cleaned? Does the backyard need to be picked up? Does the junk mail need to be thrown away?
As much as homemaking is tending to the hearts of our families, it’s also wading through the not-so-fun tasks that can pile up.
What’s great about the tangible aspect of homemaking is that you can incorporate these tasks into your daily routines. And some important stuff, like servicing appliances or scheduling repairs, doesn’t happen often.
Schedule and Maintain a Personal Quiet Time
Managing a home and heart is hard work. It’s time-consuming work.
And there will be some days where it feels like it’s all you do, from the time you wake up until the time you go to bed.
That’s why it’s a good idea to find quiet time throughout the day. Perhaps you pick up a book over an afternoon coffee and read for 20 minutes or so. If you like to craft, maybe you find time to work on a crochet project or a sewing project.
If you are a homemaker, especially a homemaker with young children, I encourage you to spend at least a little time every single day doing something that you enjoy.
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Encouragement for the New Homemaker
When managing a home feels overwhelming, I want you to know you were designed, by God, to do this.
Managing a home is a full-time job. But with baby steps, time, and dedication, you will make a big difference in the lives of your family members.
Encouragement for Young Moms
I have been a mother for five years. I am in the trenches of trying to figure out all of this with my children!
If anything is going to make you a better homemaker in this season of life, it’s going to be letting go of your expectations.
The house will one day get clean. That sweet baby will one day become a toddler fighting you to do everything. You and your husband will one day have a conversation over a cup of coffee with no interruptions.
I promise you – whatever you’re struggling with today is going to seem like a very little thing one year, three years, and five years from now.
Homemaking Inspiration
Some say that homemaking is a lost art. I’m thankful to the women who kept it alive while it entered a sort of Dark Ages.
If you are looking for even more homemaking inspiration, I highly recommend these books! For even more books and homemaking tools, check out my Resources page.
The Lifegiving Home by Sally Clarkson
This book is full of wonderful ideas you can use to draw your family together. Clarkson does a great job of laying out practical tips that can turn a house into a home. A place where a family truly wants to be.
Mother Culture by Karen Andreola
This book is geared toward homeschool moms, but the principles are universal. Andreola breaks down how the home can be a classroom, all while encouraging mothers to be the “queens of their castles!” It’s truly encouraging to be reminded that the home was meant for a woman to manage it.
For even more homemaking inspiration, follow me on Pinterest!
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